Abs & Axes

S02E01 - The road to Llaney
Heading to the land of the little people.

As you’re enjoying a pint in the Sword and Board bemoaning the lack of work on the boards lately Ser Robert the Silent and his squire Jacob Plains enter the inn. They approach your table, and with a smug grin on his face Jacob slams his hands on the table.

“What’s up, goblin-@@@@ers. Tubby here got a lead on a job but mister upstanding knight and @@@@ here’s too @@@@@ to take it. So he thought you suckers might be up for it. Some halfling @@@@@@@@@@@@ needs bodyguards and @@@@ to get a shipment of @@@@ back to Llaney. He’s scared some pack of orcs is going to show up and choke him to death with their fat green—“

Jacob starts to pantomime lewdly until Ser Robert slaps him on the shoulder and he stops talking and straightens up.

“What? Alright already! … So, you in or what?”


The party signed on to help a Halfling merchant named Jerry Maren transport a shipment of crates to Llaney. He offered decent pay for what should be simple work, and his main concern seemed to be finding “reliable people who know how to keep their mouths shut.” Everyone arranged to meet up with their horses to head out of town.

As things were starting to get organized outside the stables (with Lord Seth and Siolas seeming oddly mute) Mouse and Edgar noticed that Jerry’s cart wasn’t loaded with any supplies. Upon asking about it they were told. “Yeah, we’ll be picking up the product along the way. Don’t worry about it.”

Lord Seth was approached by another High Elf, based on his clothing clearly a servant of the noble house Lord Seth was a part of. They spoke in High Elven for a few minutes, before the servant bowed and left. (Since nobody else in the party speaks High Elven they couldn’t really understand the conversation. Being able to speak Wood Elven the only part Edgar could make out was that the servant was a messenger of some sort that had come with a message from Lord Seth’s father that he had answered in the negative and then departed.)

The party made their way north for a few days before coming to a stone bridge over the [THIS NEEDS A NAME] river. Jerry took his cart to the middle of the river and whistled a bird call that was answered from below the bridge where a group of Adhil sailors had been keeping a small barge out of sight.

Jerry took Lord Seth with him to finalize negotiations with the captain and overseer of the shipment (“Look menacing…[sigh]…I suppose that’ll have to do.”) while Edgar, Mouse and Siolas stayed back with the two Adhil bodyguards. One of them spoke with Edgar in their native tongue, recognizing him a bit since he had worked on Edgar’s uncle’s boat for a while when he was young. The two talked briefly about the nobleman (Lord Villow Clawes) who had arranged for the Dravet’s property to be seized so he could grant the land to one of the (foreign-born) knights in his service. As the bodyguard turned to leave Siolas noticed the shield he wore slung across his back, an old human-made shield with the heraldry chipped and scraped off with a crude black spider painted onto it (a symbol that Siolas was apparently familiar with). When asked where he got it from the bodyguard told them they had been attacked by Orcs on their way to deliver the product.

The negotiations complete the crates were moved from the barge to the back of Jerry’s cart. Mouse, growing more and more suspicious about the situation asked Edgar if he might know what was in them. The talkative bodyguard (also lugging crates) heard the question and told them the ship had picked them up in the northern islands of Helladhil and had bypassed the port in Haham while shipping them (trying to avoid the customs agents there). He wasn’t sure what was actually in the crates but based on where they had been picked up there were only a couple of options. He pressed his finger to his nose and made a snorting gesture to imply his guess. The crates loaded into the back of Jerry’s little cart the Adhil captain laughed and asked if the cart would be able to carry it all. Jerry just gave him back a grumpy glare.

As the party entered Dorothel they found the roads were made of cobblestone here and it was making Jerry’s ride extra bumpy. They found their path blocked by a large tree where Jerry tried to go around with his cart, but the combination of weight, the miles of cobblestones and fresh mud turned out to be too much for the cart and one of the wheels shattered.

Knowing that there was another village with a wainwright about a half day ahead Jerry assigned Mouse and Edgar to watch the cart. “Keep it safe. Guard it with your lives, the product is very important. This is the key to my gaining control over the Guild…And don’t let it get wet.” He took Lord Seth and Siolas and they went in search of a new wheel.

As they decided what to do with the crates (opting to set up their tents and put the crates inside in case the weather would change) the duo heard the grunting screams of a pair of Orcs descending on them. Mouse ducked behind the cart, but not before being struck solidly by a javelin thrown by one of the orcs. Edgar caught the pair in the pulse of magical energy causing one of them to fall asleep, but the second continued towards them. Mouse drank a potion that eased his wounds and came around the cart to slit the sleeping Orc’s throat while Edgar cast another Sleep spell. Another Orc revealed himself from the top of the bluff and attempted to open fire with his bow, but the string broke instead. His companion wolf began to run for the slope down to the cart. Mouse slit the second sleeping Orc’s throat and braced himself for the mangy wolf’s attack. The beast leapt at Mouse and bit him viciously as he attacked the wolf with his rapier and dagger.

Seeing the severity of Mouse’s wounds Edgar charged towards him handing him another healing potion and scorching the wolf with a fiery blast. The Orc archer slid down the embankment and made his way towards the pair. While Mouse finished off the charred and bleeding wolf Edgar loosed another Sleep spell at the remaining Orc dropping it to the ground where he could slip a blade into its chest.

While checking the Orcs for anything of value the duo noticed that a fair amount of their equipment was clearly cast-off (or stolen) gear from members of more “civilized” races. Another of the Orcs had a battered shield with a similar hand-painted spider emblem across it. Mouse took the remainder of the Orc archer’s wicked looking arrows with black fletching. Mouse also noticed a spot on one of the crates where the javelin that had struck him in the chest had pierced the wood and some white crystalline powder had poured out. On closer inspection it appeared that the shipment was of crates of sugar from Helladhil.

When the others returned Jerry admitted that it was in fact sugar that they were transporting. The guild he was so intent on gaining mastery over was the Confectioner’s Guild (with his specialty being hard-candies, including lollipops). The traditional crops the confectioners of Dorothel had used had been failing for the last few years, and many of them had taken to using “That crap from Adrindest, but it’s all cut with honey.” He had the crates smuggled to him to try to keep the costs down by avoiding the tariffs at the port in Haham.

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Shorties in the Southern Reaches
Where the nasty shillelaghs roam

After losing their jobs as caravan guards for a textile merchant and ending up stranded in Stanitoft, our heroes received word of a lesser nobleman from farther south that needed assistance (and was willing to pay for it). The village of Montre had spent the past few years being periodically raided by gnolls that would kidnap the peasants to use for slave labor (or worse) in the hills on the other side of the forest. Lord Jacques DeMontre had tried sending a few parties to retrieve them before but with little success. Then the gnolls went too far and kidnapped his daughter, the Lady Galia DeMontre, and he put out the call for brave souls to retrieve her.

After a bit of negotiation (not a difficult task given how preoccupied the Lord was with getting his daughter back) the party set forth to track down the gnolls and retrieve Lady DeMontre.

  • Uhtred, the Human Fighter
  • Wyn, the Elven Ranger and his hawk [unnamed].
  • Miðan, the unusually-tall-but-still-definitely-a-Halfling Thief
  • Bumpkin, the Halfling Druid with the nasty shillelagh.

As they crossed the woods to the south east of Montre (the last known direction the gnolls had been seen) a rustling was heard in the bushes. Recently left gnoll tracks were discovered, but as Wyn investigated them he was struck with a blowdart treated with a particularly strong dose of Oil of Tagit and fell unconscious. Hearing more rustling from beyond the underbrush the others charged forward finding a pair of gnolls. A fight ensued, Uhtred slashing at the gnolls with his family sword, Miðan sneaking up behind a gnoll to backstab him, and Bumpkin transforming into a coyote (like those of his homeland) and getting all up in a gnoll’s grill. After the stinking brutes had been dispatched Miðan went to scope out their camp while Uhtred and Bumpkin went back to make sure the horses didn’t wander off and to take care of their unconscious comrade.

As Miðan came to the gnoll camp she found that they had a hostage, a Wood Elven Cleric of Elad named Bran. He offered his services to attack the gnolls that had waylaid him while he was communing with nature in the woods. As Miðan and Bran came back to the clearing Wyn began to stir again and the party was able to move forward.

As they approached the far edge of the forest the party saw a small camp (with a crude banner, several cracked skulls on stakes and a small shelter) at the entrance to a jagged pass through the rocky hills. Two gnolls were huddled around a campfire for warmth in the dark and gloomy weather, arguing over a piece of meat charring over the fire. The party tied their horses to a downed log behind the tree line and made their plan. Miðan snuck forward to try to backstab one of the gnolls, but at the last minute he moved and her attack went wide. Alerted to the presence of danger the gnolls attacked and the rest of the party charged forward. The gnolls were no match for the mighty party though and soon lay dead while the party examined their camp.

They noticed that the shelter and some of the items around the camp were of better quality that what gnolls would have made for themselves, and gnolls didn’t work metal to make shackles like they found in a corner of the shelter. Possibly stolen from the people of the Southern Reaches? They also found the the banner the gnolls were flying had once been a standard from the military of the Southern Reaches before the human nations unified into a single kingdom some 214 years ago. While searching the gnolls they also found a copper ring with a small (but not particularly valuable) stone set in it, perhaps it was once a wedding band belonging to a peasant that managed to save some money.

As they continued along the narrow path through the hills Wyn’s hawk scouted ahead and alerted the party that something was amiss ahead. Miðan checked ahead on the trail and came across a trap of some sort, a section of the path that appeared to have been dug out and replaced with a layer of wood covered with gravel. Not wanting to set the trap off the party tied off their horses back at the gnoll guard post and worked their way around the edges on foot to continue.

Following the trail farther the party found it opened up into a rough clearing, an excavation site of some sort. A walkway rimmed the roughly circular space, in the center a large pit where slaves were using pickaxes to expose what appeared to be the top of a huge arched doorway made of oily looking green-tinted black stone.

After killing a sleeping gnoll guard the party was able to get a look around the area. In the center the archway was being excavated by slaves, clearly people from the Southern Reaches (Fun fact: the majority of residents of the Southern Reaches are gingers). And they were happened upon by an emaciated slave missing a foot and pulling a wheelbarrow. He seemed scared to discover that there were outsiders here even though they wanted to help him. The last time outsiders had come to “set everyone free” he had been punished for helping them (the party would later learn that incident was both how he lost his foot, how his foot came to be cooked, and the last meal he had eaten). Uhtred gave him some rations and helped him hide behind a rock to eat them to insure the slave’s silence.

The party bravely slew the remaining gnolls around the pit, even facing down one wielding a short metal rod with a large stone on one end that seemed to allow him to command the fallen skeletons around the area (apparently, even dying wasn’t enough to end their service as slave labor). But a large armored gnoll with a pair of unfriendly-looking curved swords made his way into the pit to attempt to put the party down.

After a difficult fight the party was triumphant and the boss gnoll lay dead at their feet. Then they heard a scream from the top of the ramp into the pit, the Lady Galia DeMontre, shouting at the party “After all my research and years of planning, you’ve ruined everything!” The Lady admitted that she had employed the gnolls and helped them acquire the slaves to do the digging to unearth “The Gate” beneath the swirling black clouds. The party freed the remaining slaves, shackled the Lady Galia and headed out for Montre to return her to her father.

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S01E03 - Epilogue: Siolas's story
So, how'd you get that black eye?

While standing at the back of the party contemplating the sudden demise of Major Torts, Siolas heard a sound coming from the empty library the party had just cleared. Nocking an arrow he turned and walked up the hallway a bit to investigate.

As he entered the room he looked around and didn’t notice anything out of place from how it had been when they had left it a moment ago, but he caught a glimpse of movement from the corner of his eye. It looked like his own shadow had changed direction was losing it’s humanoid shape oozing towards the single torch in the room. He drew his arrow back and released it towards the shadow as the torch (mounted in a sconce on a stone wall) suddenly sputtered out and everything went black.

He was greeted with the sound of an arrow striking wood and muffled voices. His eyes adjusted to see in the dimly lit store room full of what seemed to be wine casks just as the door opposite him (his arrow lodged in it firmly) opened from the other side with a roar of “What the hell are you doing in there?”

Dragged out into the light he found himself in a basement (the basement of the Sword and Board inn in the Crossroads, in fact). Surrounded by shirtless sweaty men, two of them flailing about on the floor pummeling one another. He was greeted by a huge Arad man with a bunch of missing teeth in his wide grin. “Good, fresh meat. First off, newbie, no bows. I mean really, what are you thinking. I’m not sure how you found us and it doesn’t really matter, just know we have a few rules. The first two, well, we’ll deal with those later. They’re easy to remember. The third rule is: if this is your first time, you have to fight…And I loves me some wood elves.”

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S01E03 - (Redacted) and the (Redacted) of (Redacted), Part Three
In which crypts are rapidly evacuated.

As the party stood over the severed head of Major Torts contemplating their next move Siolas (standing in the back of the party) heard a sound from the old library/alchemical lab room where they had fought the barricaded wizard. Nocking an arrow he went to take a look into the room at which point the torch in the wall sconce went dark.

Failing to respond to questions from the party after that everyone went back to check the room and found it was undisturbed from the state it had been in before, but Siolas was gone. After a thorough search of the room didn’t turn up any doors, traps or signs of Siolas having disturbed anything in the room since they had last been in it Edgar, Mouse and Lord Seth decided their only real option was to carry on.

Deciding to investigate the secret door which had unlocked by the trap that had killed Major Torts (and hoping to find a way around what they were concerned might be a repeatedly trapped hallway) they found a pair of rooms occupied by a zombified dog (chained to a wall), a zombie human male in what remained of fine red and white robes, and a zombie human female chained to a wall wearing the remains of a red dress. All were dispatched with careful headshots, but unfortunately the path was a dead end.

Unable to use the wooden plank “key” in any of the keyslots besides the one to open the secret room, the party decided to take the table from the library and shove it down the sloped floor where Major Torts had met his end. The ploy worked as the series of spring-loaded spinning saws became jammed in the wood, allowing the party to slip past to the next landing.

Again, the key didn’t work in the two slots at the next landing which was decorated with more dragon head carvings. Mouse was able to discern that there was another trap ahead and disabled it. As the party moved down the second ramped section of hallway the ceiling clicked and shifted as if it was some sort of trap door meant to spill its contents onto people underneath, but failed to open.

Able to retrieve the contents of Major Torts’s belt pouches the party was able to recover the money acquired from the previous fights they had encountered on the trip. Lord Seth liberated Major Torts of his breastplate and the three were able to examine his massive faintly-glowing greatsword (not like that, pervs!) and determine it was of Arad manufacture (where Major Torts was clearly not from).

On the next dragon-sculpture adorned landing it was obvious that there was another trap ahead, but Mouse was unable to discern how its mechanism worked. After some party brainstorming Lord Seth retrieved a barrel from the rooms where they zombies had been and the party rolled it down the final sloped section of the hallway. The floor triggered a mechanism to fling the barrel forward as a series of spears extended from the floor and ceiling, clearly intended to skewer the hapless victim, but the weight of the barrel smashed them clearing the path for the party.

In the room at the bottom (well lit by a previously fired errant crossbow bolt belonging to Edgar) the party found more dragon head sculptures in the corners, two ornamental displays of armor standing in alcoves (luckilly, just wooden display stands, not anything sinister), and in the center a large stone dais holding the idol they were looking for.

indiana-jones-golden-fertility-idol-bank-1.jpg

After taking a closer look at the dragon head sculptures Mouse realized that they had some sort of hidden opening in the back of their mouths leading back into the walls. Concerned that they may be facing another trap and wanting to beat a hasty retreat the party spread out back along the path to the stairs that had brought them down here, Edgar grabbing the idol and charging back towards the entrance. As the idol was removed from the dais there was a sound of liquid running through pipes and the dragon head sculptures throughout the complex began vomiting forth lamp oil. The sound of flint against steel (on a large scale) could be heard echoing from somewhere.

Mouse and Edgar charged for the door with Seth bringing up the rear. As Mouse and Edgar made their way up the steps they heard Lord Seth begin to speak but his voice was cut off mid-sentence as the last remaining torch below snuffed out. As the two remaining party members cleared the top of the stairs a blast of flame and choking smoke came spewing out of the spiral stairway behind them.

As they stopped to contemplate the idol and catch their breath, Edgar and Mouse noticed the sound of arcane words being spoken from nearby and were engulfed in a mass of gooey webs. Confronted by a well-dressed aging wizard a second stranger appeared. Younger and dressed in a leather jerkin with a wide brimmed hat, he brandished a crossbow at the party and told them that if they handed over the idol he’d allow them to live even though they had killed three of his friends. Mouse demanded to know why the men wanted the idol to which the younger of the two replied, “It belongs in a museum.” The older man began to chant and gesture again and an unnatural sleep overtook Edgar and Mouse.

When they awoke amid the decaying remains of the web spell it was obvious that a path had been chopped through it to where Edgar had been restrained, the idol was missing. A mass of kobolds (all elderly, infirm, women and children) brandished improvised weapons at the pair telling them they could camp outside the keep’s walls but that this was “Kobold City” and they were not welcome here. It became clear that Jean Daninois and his father had used a “Returner”, a magic item from the United Portal Service to teleport to somewhere else. Having left their horses and cart behind (and some camping gear). Edgar and Mouse set back out for the Crossroads with the various horses and carts from the Daninois group and Berellenoq and Torts hoping to sell them when they returned.

Upon their return in the Crossroads Edgar and Mouse found what seemed like an incredibly unlikely sight. There, in the Sword and Board Inn, Siolas and Lord Seth sitting at a table together. Siolas nursing a very large black eye and with a split lip. Lord Seth looking a bit ill and warning everyone else to not purchase the kabobs from the inn any more.

See also…

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S01E02 - (Redacted) and the (Redacted) of (Redacted), Part Two
In which fights are had with multiple short people.

The morning after the Kobold-slaughterfest a beleaguered mule-cart arrives carrying a tardy High Elven Paladin (Lord Seth) in a blue tabard with a yellow fleur-de-lys embroidered on the front. After Major Torts paid the mule-cart driver he ushered everyone into the back of his and Berellenoq’s cart and the party made your way to Ferrelton.

As the party crossed what was once the village square of the long-abandoned town they saw a rising puff of smoke from the side of the keep overlooking the town. When the party arrived they found that someone had used a keg of gunpowder to breach the outer wall of the keep to get inside.

Berellenoq rushed to the opening and, seeing a Dwarf he recognized, pulled his dagger and charged towards the Dwarf. But the Dwarf got the drop on him and fired a well-placed crossbow bolt through Berellenoq’s face before calling out a warning to his compatriots.

With the assistance of Major Torts the party killed the fez-wearing Dwarf and (after hearing a Halfling voice from below asking for a status update) proceeded down a spiral staircase that had been exposed by the blast that had opened the wall. (With Edgar of Porthea, the Sorcerer, donning his newfound headgear.)

As the party regrouped at the bottom of the spiral staircase between a pair of dragon head sculptures (that had once been painted white but had flaked off with age). In the light of a single flickering torch in a wall sconce Major Torts was attacked from behind by a wailing Halfling assailant in a blue and white striped headwrap, but the party made quick work of him despite a critical error on the part of Siolas which sent an arrow into the back of Major Torts’s shoulder.

After the swearing died down Major Torts decided the party should approach the western passageway where there was a lit room and a flipped table being used as a barricade. A wizard in a tattered off-white robe with short grey hair threatened the part from behind the table and caused the hallway leading up to it to become dangerously slippery. Edgar shot a flaming bolt into his makeshift cover causing it to catch fire and the wizard wasted valuable time putting it out. Siolas fell victim to the slick corridor while the rest of the party made their way into the room where Mouse, Lord Seth and Major Torts made short work of the addled wizard.

Lying next to the wizard’s body the party found a large leather-bound journal with a heraldic device on the front.

House_Ferrel.png

The journal was written in an outdated version of the Thell language, but included a diagram of an idol which Major Torts identified as being the item they were after.

idol-drawing.jpg

(The in-game drawing varies from this drawing a bit: it has two large tusk-like teeth that extend upwards from the lower jaw; it appears to be clutching a hammer to it’s chest; the figure between its legs has tentacles; there are notes in the margin that state that the person who wrote them was unsure if it had vanquished the tentacled figure or given birth to it.)

The party also found a wooden panel, approximately six inches square, the sides laminated with a thin sheet of metal it appeared to have holes punched through it randomly. Along one edge another layer of wood had been added to make a sort of handle or grip, and a rotting leather cord was looped through a hole in the grip.

On the wall in this former library was an aging shield which Lord Seth was able to identify as some sort of Elven heraldic device, but not one he was familiar with (and he was familiar with all the High Elven noble families).

Elven_Army_-_3rd_Infantry.png

Major Torts declared the party would explore the northern corridor and proceeded down the first sloped section of the corridor. Mid-step a sound like metal grinding against stone was heard and Major Torts tipped forwards down the incline while his head came rolling backwards to land at the party’s feet.

After some searching the party found a series of vertical slots in the walls above the sloped section of the floor that were a similar size to the wooden square. After trying the two nearest to the corridor on either side, the wooden square slid into a slot to the right of the corridor exposing a door to the side of the alcove which had been disguised as a portion of the wall.

With their employers both dead and in the depths of a long-abandoned crypt what would they do next?

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S01E01 - (Redacted) and the (Redacted) of (Redacted), Part One
In which Kobolds prove potentially hazardous.

(This had kind of a lot of pre-written intro stuff to it. Skip to the “Finally Action” part below to find the real deal with what went on.)

I could use whatever notes on the actual fight anyone would like to include. My brain goes fuzzy after a while. (A short while. A very short while. What was I saying?)

After finding yourselves in The Crossroads (by hook or by crook) you’ve come to find that the promise of easy adventuring fame is a bit more fleeting than you had originally hoped. While there are a number of employers hiring those of the adventuring ilk many of them are less than accommodating to those with little actual experience in their field of choice.

Finally, after a few weeks of searching a new post appears on the bulletin board outside the Sword and Board inn and boarding house (home of many a wayward adventurer passing through or stranded in the area indefinitely) offering pay for assistance with an archaeological project (and with “no experience necessary” clearly stated on the announcement).

Obviously, this is the perfect opportunity for someone such as yourself looking to build their adventuring resume and nothing could possibly go wrong.


There’s a saying in the realms that “All the nuts get sold at The Crossroads” and your initial experience with applying for the job listing you found outside the Sword and Board certainly reinforces the point. A motley collection of “colorful” fellows gathered in the public house for the initial winnowing of the applicants. The enterprise at hands was being organized by two men who you got the distinct feeling probably wouldn’t have been hanging out together if there wasn’t a task to be completed.

The smaller of the men, flirting with the far edge of middle age did the introductory speaking. A man who sadly would be described as “average” in regard to most any question one could think up. Showing the wear of a traveler’s lifestyle in his salt and pepper hair and slightly worn clothing. He wore a common enough outfit, mostly in light colors to help endure the heat of a summer day on the plains.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, my name is Berellenoq, Major Torts and I will be performing a simple archaeological dig a few days travel from here. As you know there’s been an increase in the number of Orc attacks on travelers lately and I think we’d all agree that there’s safety in numbers. Major…”

The small man cedes the floor to his tightly wound compatriot. A tall man with short-cropped dark hair, a weak chin and a receding hairline. Even in the stifling summer heat he’s wearing his full combat attire, leather armor reinforced with chain mail. A plate mail breastplate with a worn military ornament on the chest. All of it carefully oiled and rubbed with black ink, the hilt of an engraved greatsword visible over his shoulder.

“We will not be discussing the destination or purpose of our effort with you today. Should you meet our criteria you will be told all you need to know.”

A few of the potential adventurers, clearly mistrustful, get up and leave. As he continues to speak, he continues to hemorrhage applicants at seemingly every turn.

“The pay for this mission will be 40 Pharaz (the gold pieces minted by the Kingdom of Thellerg), this will be payed with 10 up front and the rest upon our return to the Crossroads. Your transportation and meals will be provided for you. We do not anticipate violence, but we will remain prepared for it and you will be expected to fight if necessary…”

He continues on for a few minutes until, realizing that the five of you are the only ones left in the room, Berellenoq interrupts and takes the floor again.

“Well, it looks like you good folk are just the type of adventurous spirits we’re looking for. If I can get you all to sign a bit of paperwork we’ll leave at first light.”


As promised, you departed at dawn. Major Torts clearly didn’t feel the need to tell everyone that the transportation they would be providing would be in the back of a horsecart, but here you are. The summer sun of the plains beating down on you as the horses lumber onward.

Sometime around noon Berellenoq rifles through a chest in the front of the cart and pulls out a handful of hard tack rations, as he passes them back for the rest of you he tells you about the undertaking in more detail.

“You may have heard of the abandoned village of Ferrelton to the southeast. A couple hundred years ago the heir to the noble family that oversaw the village showed a talent for research in the arcane and an unfortunate obsession with the dead. As people in the village would fall ill he would have them brought to the keep, most of them never coming back out again. He developed an obsession for the local millner’s daughter and eventually had her brought to his keep, not long after that the peasants revolted and burned the keep to the ground. His keep was only a day or so’s ride from the edge of the Edhelgoroth and he would go there as part of his research, there’s some letters from the time asking other researchers questions about a gold idol he had come to possess. That’s what we’re after. Somewhere buried under what’s left of the keep is that idol.”


As the blazing sun of the afternoon starts to give way to dusk Major Torts pulls the cart to a stop in a small clearing in the sparse woods.

“We’ve got another day’s ride ahead of us, but we’ll camp here for the night. You, you and you,” He says picking seemingly at random, “you have guard duty for the night. First watch, second watch, third watch. No slacking off.”

He goes off to set up his tent. Throwing back a “Start a fire, there’s more hard tack for supper” with a chuckle over his armored shoulder as he goes.


The first watch passes quietly and it’s as Mouse has resigned himself to a night of unrelenting boredom in the second hour of his watch that he notices the scratching of some sort of animal beyond the edge of the light cast by the campfire. Something is nearby.

(Finally, action!)

Attacked by a group of Kobolds with a wolf, a vicious battle broke out around the campfire. Mouse quickly dispatched the wolf and called to wake everyone as an unnatural fog closed in over most of the camp.

Siolas and Edgar quickly came to Mouse’s aid in the fight with the Kobolds while your employers stumbled around in their tents trying to gather their equipment.

The Kobold shaman (being inventive, but not very bright) cast a Sleep spell which knocked Mouse out as well as one of the Kobold spearmen and Berellenoq.

While slicing (Siolas) and barbecuing (Edgar) most of your attackers Siolas was struck by arrows fired by the Kobold archers and collapsed, unconscious.

Major Torts (breastplate on and ludicrously oversized greatsword in hand) came charging out of the fog and after being frosted over by the Kobold Shaman (and pegged in the shoulder with an arrow) worked with Edgar to slaughter the remaining Kobolds. While Torts berated you Edgar and Berellenoq did what they could to patch up everyone’s wounds.

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